Life gives you lemons make lemonade...

Once again it has been awhile since I have posted. Life doesn't seem to slow down much here.
I am finally off the crutches & back to (my) normal.
It is a struggle with granny to take her meds daily....she gets up at noon, complains her left arm hurts.. I observe she hasn't taken her heart meds yet.. I mention this to her, my final words are it's your decision if you take them or not. She takes her meds & back to sleep she goes. I figure I'd give the meds time to work before we spend the afternoon at the emergency room..
She wakes up feeling fabulous!

I took granny to get her Catract removed.. Her primary & heart doctors signed off on the procedure.. The anesthesiologist  states he's not sure they can proceed.. Now keep on mind she is totally prepped, we've been at the hospital for almost 2hrs & he's not sure... I got a little irritated, told him all the doctors ok'd this and we are having it done..after looking at her chart he decided to move forward..
Surgery went well & she recovered fine. Now onto the next Catract. This woman is keing me hopping...

I have been giving granny chores to do just like she used to do for me...
She is doing her laundry, emptying & filling the dishwasher, cleaning her bathroom (make that light cleaning). She offered to water the fruit trees planted however she is still waiting to start that tomorrow..

I have found she does things to yank my chain.... She keeps repeating what I can't hear you, however she can her a small clock across the room chime... I stop repeating myself at that point & go do something else ..

I have found she can be irritable as can be with me but when my hubby comes home she turns on the charm.. He is wise enough to realize she does these things & they drive me crazy.
We have decided to treat her as if she is either 10 or 5 yrs old, depending on how she's acting.. Changes my whole outlook and my response with her for the better..

No matter how crazy she drives me I try to remember this is not the life she dreamed of when she was young. A lot of the things she forgets is not on purpose.. It is easier to find the hallmark channel for her than to make her feel bad because she can't remember how.

The beginning of August my hubby is taking her to her ( our) family reunion. I will be attending a wedding photography workshop on that weekend. Hubby understands how important this is to me & yet how important for granny to go to the reunion. I know it's not something on the top of his bucket list to do, he is willing to take her & also is going to take my commercial cotton candy machine, spend the afternoon making candy while she socializes.  I appreciate him so much! His support of me & having granny live with us. He's a keeper.. Which reminds me of granny telling me I need to figure out how I'm going to hold onto him... I replied I've healed onto him for 33 yrs so it must be working...  In my head I think I really should up my game...

Tomorrow my grandblessings arrive from Tennessee will arrive for 2wks. I'm excited for the kids (5 & almost 7) to get to know her, spend time with her & to take some pictures of them together.
We don't  know how long any of us have & need to use the time we have wisely.

life throws you curves

So I seriously haven't blogged since 4/23.... Eek. I really have a great excuse.. I tore my meniscus in early April...  Finally had surgery on what was suppose to be the first day of our vacation to Zion National Park in Utah. I put off blogging which was the best decision since I had a bad attitude toward everything, everyone... especially Granny...
As I was sitting on the couch, unable to move without crutches, I was getting a play by play description of the birds on the feeders.. What they were doing, how they were doing, where they flew to, etc. I quickly made my exit to the basement with my knitting, dt coke and peanut m&m's for the day.
As I sat listening I took notes, some of things are pretty funny....
Granny asked the nurse who was checking her pace maker: Why do I keep getting these whiskers on my chin? The nurse replied: hormones... Granny: I thought those were all dead.....

To me: You sing pretty good, you could be a Tiny Tim, tip toe thru the tulips.... It's time for a woman to be a Tiny Tim....

Granny: When my father in law got married to Helen, She had to go on birth control....
I was so surprised... I thought she was hoping for a bucket of starch on his side of the bed...
(I guess starch was the Viagra of the day)

Granny: If you stand her and take a picture of the neighbors home and send it to them anonymously, tell them we can't see their house because of that tree....
I replied, well all they have to do is stand & will be able to figure out who can't see their house....
you won't be anonymously anymore


After our joint hair appointment @ Karen's Country Cuts
Granny: Oh your hair looks so much better! It was long and stringy before....
I do believe there is a compliment in there somewhere..


Last week I made a doctor appointment because Granny was short of breath
She needed to get undressed for her EKG.
Me: you look really nice today
Granny: Well I even wore my bra & boob, it's uncomfortable, maybe you can carry it out
Me: There is no way I'm carrying your bra and boob out in the office....You will wear it home....

Then off to get xrays:
I park in front of the hospital, get the crutches, go in explain the ole gal needs a wheelchair.
A gal comes out and they wheel her around, down to xray, back to front door, I get the car, get home

Next day: talking to someone about her lifeline necklace....
Granny: I don't have my necklace.
Me: Where is it? When did you have it last?
Granny: why I don't know.
I narrow it down to xray, figures since I didn't go into the room with her this time....
We head out to the hospital.. I crutch all the way to xray to find out it is at the front desk......
Thankfully we got the necklace back. Now need to write her name on it....



Yesterday was the eye doctor appt:
Granny immediately made friends with another elderly woman & her daughter... She proudly proclaims I am 76 & I live with Julie....
The elderly lady says I am 82 & I live alone....
After both ladies (granny & elderly friend) went back to their respective rooms I chatted with the daughter...
Who is really the daughter in law, who is 72!! Her husband is an only child so they can't spread the joy of helping.
She is almost 20yrs older than me & we clicked right off.  We have so much in common it was scary.
We are living the same life except she has to go to her mother's apartment daily....

We wished each other the best as we parted. It was refreshing....

Last night a group of girls  (We missed you Cindy & Val) & I went to see The other woman...
I haven't laughed so hard in forever. It was awesome to get out & think of nothing, laugh with friends. I can be my catty selfish self & the girls don't judge.. I said something (which I won't share) My friends started laughing & said I'm so glad you shared that with us.... said something about it's out of your system now & you won't say it out loud....

Now those are true friends....

Old people need to be touched.....

I woke up this morning thinking how much I miss the Hubby. I miss being touched, holding hands, just basic touches.
Which made me realize how little my mom is touched daily, weekly...
Doctor appointments don't count as touches.
Hair appointments don't count as touches.
Caregiver touches really don't count because they are not a loved one.
Is lack of touching one of the causes of depression? I know it affect me when I am alone for a week.
It  must  be so much worse for someone who is now alone, without their spouse to touch them and hold them daily.
My goal is touch my mom daily on purpose... To give her a hug...
An experiment to see how personal daily touch affects her. I'm expecting good things from this....
Stay tuned....

Oh Doris..... Granny wobbles and she does fall down....

So Granny fell 2 wks ago. She's been in a lot of pain. We went to her primary doctor after the er visit. (Thursday) She upped her pain meds, ordered new xrays. Off to the hospital we go. As I pull up the valet (love that man whoever he is) comes out with a wheelchair, wheels her in, and then parks my car...
We get her registered head up to radiology. Whoever built the ramp or whatever it is called to radiology must had been sleeping that day, it is uphill... Yes uphill pushing Granny. She's not a huge woman but she's not featherweight either.... I had hurt my knee the week she fell & had been babying it. Pushing her I felt a twang.. Not a good twang either. Back to Granny...
Her wheelchair wouldn't fit thru the doorway into the xray area.... The girl kept banging it in the door jam saying it won't fit.... duh... Can she walk? No She can't.. She finally took her around thru the hall...Her xrays stilled showed no broken bones.
Fast forward to Tuesday: Off to the heart doctor we went with grand daughter in tow... He decides to postpone all procedures he had planned for 6-8wks. We are at this office for 2hrs.. Baby girl didn't sleep or cry.
We came home, left baby girl in the car while helping granny get into the house. We have 3 steps... Routine is she walks to steps, I move walker in the house, she stands and WAITS.... then I help her in... today she had a totally new routine... while I move the walker in she takes the first step holding onto NOTHING & down she goes again.. landing on her bad side in the garage. Baby girl is now screaming.... I called Hubby & Daughter to come and help me. We get her up, into the house, check her over, give her another pain pill & off to bed she goes.
Made a doctor appt for the next day.. I was cleaning and taking things down to the basement & thought I was going to die when my knee felt like a rubber band snapped.... Call the Hubby again, who now wonders how we live when he is traveling... Call Daughter, Hubby takes Granny to the Doctor, Daughter goes into the exam room with her. I'm sure Hubby was very thankful for Daughter....Doctor ordered more xrays... This time fractured ribs show up. No wonder the old gal is in pain.... Ordered more meds...
I make appt for my knee for the next day... Doctor thinks I had a bakers cyst burst and probable torn  meniscus... Now waiting for an MRI for me, Granny is in pain & I am limping around... What a pair we make... Granny keeps telling me to use her walker when she is sitting.... No way will I move it away from her.....
Can't wait to see what happens next week.... I have a feeling it will be awesome...

What week we have had....

Conversation when we were watching tv:
When I was in 5 or 6th grade I was able to look at someone and tell if they were Jews. I'm sure I heard someone talk about that Jew. Someone who lived 2 downs from us and he was foreign, I wouldn't be surprised if he wasn't a Jew. People were jealous of them for having money. The woman were beautiful...

flipping thru the channels ~ stop watch change, it's a cycle..
Me: Oh I like this one the Blacklist...
Her: replies well that is the one I was looking for....
Me: in my head sure you were.... 10 minutes ago you were going to bed
 proceeds to talk thru the whole show... Which is ok, I can watch it on demand tomorrow morning while you sleep...



Our Church's small group meets at our place:
In  group shared she doesn't hold grudges and ask me in front of everyone if this was true..
My eyes got big as I struggled to answer this one in front of everyone..... I finally replied

I don't thing it is fair to ask me in front of everyone, she didn't agree with me said she doesn't hold grudges.

Her:in our house if you told the truth you didn't get in  trouble but if you lied it was much worse...
Me: in my head I must have lived in a different house.......

Fast forward to Friday.......
Granny was doing her own laundry (which I encourage to keep her mobile)
She proceeded to go into her bedroom to put away her clothes. Shutting the door behind her...
Mistake 1. the walker is in the living room
Mistake 2 shutting the bedroom door
Meanwhile I am talking to Hubby on the phone.. yak yak yak & the damn dog won't quit barking...
Hubby suggest putting her special collar on her..
I grab the collar and go after her, she runs away, circles back barking at Granny's door...
I slowly understand the problem, Granny is calling for help! I open the door and she laying on the floor.. I stubbed my toe and fell she says...
I tell Hubby I gotta go.....
I call for the ambulance, move stuff out of the way, grab all her meds, call Shannon, Jane, hubby give an update.... oh and took dinner out of the oven (for once this week I was actually on top of dinner plans)
Granny had xrays which thankfully showed no broken bones.. She hurt her shoulder and collar bone, is sore where she hit the sewing cabinet, basically is in a whole lot of pain....
As we left the house we forgot Granny's shoes and coat, which if we lived anywhere else wouldn't be an issue however it was snowing.....
This morning Granny is still in a lot of pain and will continue to be I believe. There is a possibility of a torn rotator cuff that will need to be checked out....
I'm thankful this week is over & especially thankful Granny didn't break any bones (that we know of), Thankful Shannon came and helped me stay sane,
Oh about the damn dog, it looks like she won't ever move out...... She has earned her place in our home however she will always be the damn dog to me....

It's a new week

So Doris was looking at at my Easter Mini Session card that was laying on the table. She states "Well they better bring their cameras or just forget about it..."
Now I am totally confused with where this conversation is going... "What do you mean?" I asked
She replies "If they don't bring their cameras they need to just go home" "Why do they need their own cameras I ask, I am the one taking their pictures, they are paying for me to take them..."
"What a brilliant idea you have" she responds. She then proceeds to tell her sister what a smart idea it is to take their pictures for them...
Gotta laugh...

Conversation with the Hubby:
When I was younger I wanted to go and bomb every place that sold alcohol... But I'm not in that place anymore....
 hmmm.... Not really sure what to think about that one..

Today:
Her: Well I think I will go to bed..
Me: ok, Tena comes in the morning..
Her: looking blank ~ whose coming
Me: Tena
Her: I don't know who that is...
Me: Tena, your caregiver who cleans your room
 In my head: it's time to check for another UTI... confusion is one of the signs in the elderly...

Friday will be busy with blood work and eye doctor appt.. hoping to talk about cataract surgery soon

It's been a good week so far, I know it  is only Wednesday I still have high hopes for the rest of the week..

March the month I'd like to skip...

It's been a few weeks since I posted. March has been a hard month for me. Thankfully April is almost here. The sun is shining more, hopefully the snow quits, days are longer.. March 1st is the anniversary of my sister Beth's death. It's been (I think) 10 years. We weren't close until she was diagnosed with liver cancer. (don't wait until someone is dying to show your love). I still struggle with the circumstances of that last week. Anyhow to make the week even better 2 days later we celebrate my birthday. I don't really like birthdays. So the plan of the day was dinner @Hobo's in Muskegon with Shannon, Tim, Little L, Granny & Hubby. As I ordered my vodka tonic with lime, granny leans over and ask what I ordered. I replied tonic with lime. She ask, with vodka? I replied I certainly hope so.. Granny doesn't drink, her father was an alcoholic and even tho she has given us permission to have a glass of wine (yes she did say that), I try to be respectful of her feeling about it. Fast forward to the next day:
Granny: I should have stayed home last night...
Me: didn't you have fun?
Granny: yes, but you should have celebrated with your family..
Me: I did! you are part of the family...
She still doesn't see herself as part of our family, I'm trying hard to include her, make her feel included...It's hard to not make it personal.. This was the first birthday since I was 18 she has been with me to celebrate.. It's been a hard month for granny too.
She sleeps the majority of the day & night.. Which I've learned isn't such a bad thing for me. Instead of focusing on how much she sleeps I tend to embrace it.. It's a time I can do anything or just be alone. I am confident once her health issues are fixed she won't be sleeping so much. Last week was her first appt with the heart specialist. We learned her heart is out of rhythm (which makes one tired), her pacemaker is going to need replacing in 6-12months. Granny was talking to someone (everyone) telling them the doctor thought her scar from the breast cancer healed very nice. After hearing this story at least 5 times, I finally spoke up and told her he was talking about her pacemaker scar!!! He wasn't near the other scar.. Yesterday was the appointment for the procedure to put her heart back in rhythm.. Epic fail.... They knock you out, then shock you. they tried it 3 times and it didn't work. Adding another heart med to her list, in a month will shock her again. Little L came over Tuesday, Granny decided she needed to give her a nickname... Pork chop or porky... her reasoning ~ Little L has fat rolls... in my head I said "no wonder I see a counselor, and we need to start a fund for Little L's counseling when she's older.." I told granny she needed to find a better nickname for her. Toots, Luc, and cupcake it is.... she's so sweet I could eat her up... better start that fund next payday.
Took granny to church Wednesday for soups on. Churches in the area provide soups every Wednesday during Lent. She was sitting out in the foyer by herself, I motioned come in with everyone and make a friend... She was observing people (must be why I'm a people watcher) she asked about a man, I told her he's so and so husband. She replied I hope he had good eyesight when he was younger... My head whipped around, What does that mean? She replies well she's very beautiful.... I'm thinking it was a compliment in a backward way...
My Friend Val is working on getting granny to go to the local health club (whatever it's called) to swim.. She's ordered bathing suits for her to try on.. I think once granny gets there she will enjoy it.. it's baby steps getting her in pool.. I'm thankful for friends that reach out to granny....

Feeling a bit whiny today

It has been a very long week.... I have been sick since last Tuesday, sleeping everyday, most of the day. I finally went to the doctors & got meds, which should be helping (they aren't). I get very testy when I am sick..
Everytime I step into the living room Doris ask if my allergies are better.. I reply it's asthma... At least 5 times a day.
I made the doctor appt, went to it, picked up the meds all before she was out of bed.... She had no idea I even left.
I get cranky when I don't feel well. My throat hurts like crazy. So sitting across from a deaf woman whose hearing aid isn't in her ear makes me a little testy.... What, I can't hear you... Boy your throat sounds really sore.... I give up.

This morning she wasn't able to go to church because she has a pain in her chest... around the pacemaker. Hubby tells her to give it time & see if she feels better. She comes out of her bedroom a bit later stating she burped & now her chest is better..

I know she cares, she keeps asking if I feel better.. the problem is I don't feel better & asking if I do makes me testy....

This too will pass & I will actually feel better, will be able to answer nicely why yes I do feel better. Until then when she ask, I will think to myself, she's only asking because she cares, and I will answer nicely..

Doctor appts are informative in more ways than one..

Today Doris had a recheck appointment at the eye doctors. I admit I did not anticipate how entertaining this was going to be as I got ready...

I finally got her out the door only 10 minutes later than I desired.. It is a snowy  blowing blizzard like day... brrr not really the best weather to take her out in.

As we are driving out of no where Doris tells me when I get to be 70 my boobs will hang down and I can tuck them in my waistband...

In my head I think this is going to be good...

I respond I don't think so, I won't have that problem

She tells me I am wrong I still have 20yrs for them to droop...

I respond, no you're wrong Dad alway told us as teens to wear a bra or when we are old we would have to use a curler and roll them up... I wore my bra so I'm safe..

She starts laughing and states she had forgotten about that, and time will tell....

Next topic:

Oh you still have your pearl ring.

Me: yes, I still wear it at times

Doris: Are we going to the office where Al works?

Me: No, why

Doris: Well you always perk up when he comes over...

Me: in my head Really!! Get a life Doris..

Me : outloud, I don't think so

Doris: He must remind you of your dad his name was Al too

Me: laughing um no he doesn't remind me of dad & what does that have to do with my pearl ring?

Doris had no answer for me.....

We were sitting at eye doctors waiting room, an older woman comes in (with her son) Doris yells across room about winter being nasty and asked if she was going to florida next year. The lady responds No.

Doris replies My husband was a trucker and he always said tell was nothing worth seeing in Florida.. I piped up and said I lived in Florida for 3 years.... you could have visited me..

Doris couldn't hear me, she was listening to the old woman talk about Tampa...

 

Finished up and loading her in the car:

Doris: It is so cold a kangaroos balls would freeze off....

Me: gosh I hope a kangaroo doesn't live here it is way to cold....  wondering where did that come from....  can you say her filter is broken....

Almost home:

Doris: I don't believe The Lord will come back anytime soon.

Me: Why do you think that?

Doris Well, It is so cold here and he wears a thin gown..

I have no response for that one, Can't even begin to form an answer...  Somethings are better left unsaid...

All in all it was a informative day....

Doris vs Me

Doris ~ there is so much love in this home
Hubby ~ I thought you took your hearing aids out at night
Doris ~ perplexed, I do...Oh I'm not talking about that kind of love
I start laughing and shaking my head...

Her: Have you ever thought of a  hair piece, you could wear it up and down, it would look very attractive.

Me: no I don't 

Her: it would look really good

Me: no, nope

Her even if it was paid for?

Me: no I don't want one

Her: Well you would  look attractive with one.....

hmm was kinda afraid to ask what she was really saying......

Her: I really like Deb, I think that is her name.. she's 60

Me: Her husband is 70..

Her: Does he have a brother......

Hmmm. guess the new meds are kicking in..

 

Doris was talking to someone at her  cousins home and telling whole history

I'm 76 you start going down hill as soon as you turn 21. She hangs up & says I have no idea who I was talking too.....

 

Doris: So and so used to store her paper work under the couch.  Her hubby  brought a big desk in and put it in the middle of the living room. I told him, his wife  should be able to find a place for all her papers now….. 

Me:  I interrupted, it's comments like that that cause problems. You didn't need to say those things about her storing and filing issues.

Doris: Well it didn't help, her hubby said the desk was for him...

ov vey

 

Doris: The ringing in my ears is really bad today...

Me: have you mentioned this to the doctors, do they know your ears ring?

Doris: why no, I just deal with it....

Ugh make a note. talk to doctor about ringing ears

Doris to caregiver: straighten up my room (please), put my 3 eye drops in the empty candy box

Me: 3 eye drops? you have 2..

Doris: No I have 3

Caregiver just stands and stares at us

Me: Doctor knows you have 2 where did the other come from?

Doris: I don't know....

Doris: and those new drops burn...

Me: you've had those new drops for over a week now & now are mentioning burning...

Fast forward:

I take all 3 bottles to eye doctor, ask what she is suppose to use, come home & give 2 back, keep 1 and confirm burning is normal...

Doris:couple days later, my eyes don't hurt so much now..

Me: probably because you were using 3 glaucoma drops instead of 2, over medicating....

Life continues to be full of funny moments...

frustrations, disappointments & pity parties

As I sit and contemplate what to write about from last week, I'm can only think about frustrations & disappointments.
So many things have changed since Doris moved in with us. I quit my job which I enjoyed immensely. I have been to so many new doctor offices I have lost count. There is never a day that starts out with I feel wonderful today or even today is a good day.

We watched TV in the basement but now there is a TV in our living room. The TV has caption across the screen and still the sound is loud. The loudness is a constant.

Some of the plans I had made for photography have been put on hold. This week is the Special Olympic Winter Games. I  had planned on going and taking pictures, just for the fun of it. However I can't leave Doris for 2-3 days alone... Hubby is leaving for the week ~ his 3rd week of traveling...
I don't feel I can ask someone to sit with her & keep the wood stove going. Also the doctor appts this week...
So I wrote all that last Sunday during a bout of pity party syndrome...
This week Doris had a ultrasound Tuesday.. The day I usually have my granddaughter baby L for the day... So I will be pushing the wheelchair with Doris holding baby L who is nearly 5mo.. What sight we are as I go down to radiology... Do you have a good hold on baby L? Her mom won't understand if you drop her!
As we enter the waiting room, it is kinda full today. A young (I mean young!) pregnant couple, her mom & sister. Another family was waiting pregnant mom, dad & 2 girls.
The girls were playing with baby L. making her laugh and generally entertaining her. Fast forward to the evening:
Talking to Shannon: baby L is so precious.. Everyone thinks so. Then mumbled something about colors....
Later: Baby L is so precious. There was a colored family in the waiting room & even they thought she was precious... Doris was impressed that the "colored" family thought a "white" baby was precious...
She continually tells me she isn't racist, bigot, she loves everyone equally..... skin doesn't matter to her.
When I'm in a mood, I will reply color, what color are they, green, red, purple? She will sheepishly reply why they are black....

Last week Doris called her cousin John, who is out of state for the winter (smart man I say) anyhow Doris is talking to someone, giving all her history.. from people dying to breaking of bones, to what a good cook I am... She talked for maybe 20-30min.... Hangs up, looks at me & says I have no idea who that was, it was one of John's grand kids I think....
These conversations Doris has with people, spilling her guts reminds me to never never ever share anything personal & private with Doris.... It won't stay personal & private...

I was able to go to Grand Haven Pier this week. I was showing her some of the pictures ~ her response was are you able to make those darker before you print, I said yes, She replied that would look better.... hmm I wonder why my self esteem takes a dip every so often..... Then I talk to my friends who help me see it isn't me, I am the normal one

...

tidbits from Doris

Doris received a call from Uncle B, hangs up & says Aunt Chris died! I replied That is too bad, do you want to go to the funeral? No she replies. I haven't seen her in years.
Throughout the day she calls various people telling them the news....
Fast forward to the next evening when Uncle B calls again ~ sorry Doris, it wasn't Chris who died but her sister...... When she hangs up I ask how many people she told who knew Chris & needs to call and set the record straight. She replies oh no one...
In my head I think only Doris....

A relative is going in for colon surgery she called the wife & said "hi, put Vaseline around his rectum to help with irritation... love you bye" that was the whole conversation.. She looked at me & says I think she appreciated me calling. I couldn't reply I was laughing so hard....

I sit at the kitchen table editing photos. Doris joins me sitting at my elbow... She is very helpful!
that looks funny
can you cut it off so she doesn't look like you cut her in half
that baby looks pale, change the background color
and my favorite: the background is multi color polka dots
are you going to leave the polka dots fuzzy?
I reply yes, I am
She ask do you think that looks good? I look at her (irritated) Yes, That is why I did it...
She ask do you think it takes the focus off the baby? I replied (more irritated) no I don't
She replies well if the dots were in focus it would.....Which is why they are fuzzy I reply!
Really, did you really just have this conversation with me...
My favorite observation : that girl looks like a football player....


The caregiver who comes and helps Doris bathe has been driving Doris a little crazy lately..
Miss T started a load of laundry. dark clothes & Doris' new flannel nightgowns - light in color...
Doris has been talking about this for a week now. I finally responded do your own laundry, you are able enough to do it. She replied I think I will... problem solved

Doris came into the living room  with a new problem:
She got a clean pair of panties out of the dressers. She came out to tell me Miss T ruined them. I asked how did she do that? Well she must have mopped the floor with my panties! They are dingy now.. I laugh & said she doesn't mop mom, they probably went thru the laundry in a dark load... Doris responds well maybe that is what happened. She decided she'd bleach them, I suggested throwing them away. She decides to  throw them since they are pretty old....
I laugh to myself and think it really is time to buy the  ole girl some new panties.... It will make her day I believe..

Doris has been helping out more ~ last week she emptied the dishwasher twice, and she put the dirty dishes in it. She washed the dishes that were too big, she has gotten her own soup & warmed it herself. She cleaned the table next to her chair, which is loaded down with magazines, kleenex, papers, bowl of skittles & who know what else... She mentioned to it to Mike, I cleaned my table off? She told me I know he likes things in their place....

The things Doris tends to say are funny only because she has no filter.... Her filter is totally broken and she says things she would have never said years ago. She really thinks shes being helpful, and is glad to help any way she can.
By finding the humor in the situation helps me keep my sanity at times

*** the lump I mentioned in the last post was not cancer!!!! happy dance going on here

the lump, the piercing & the old biddy

Doris: Shannon, you have your nose pierced?
Shannon: Yes Granny I do.
Doris: I'd like to get mine pierced too, but I don't want a gaudy ring in it, just a small one
Me: in my head I say I'm not taking you to get your nose pierced your 76 yrs old.....

Doris: When I go to my room I take my hearing aid out right away & turn it off..
Shannon & I look at each other perplexed... ok
Doris: That way I won't a thing from your bedroom Julie.....
We start laughing, I'm not sure what she thinks goes on in there & I'm not going to ask either. Ignorance is bliss


Doris: I'm going to take a nap.
Me: listen you old biddy, you can't nap you have to stay up.
Doris: I can't nap?
Me: nope.
Doris: Well then I like your sweater it's pretty, when are you going to give it to me? You called me an old biddy....
Me: I like this sweater you can't have it & you are an old biddy sometimes...
We start laughing together. Bonding as mother & daughter, old biddy & young
biddy.


Today Doris went for an ultrasound on her breast. She was quite subdued and quiet today, no waiting room stories to share. She has a lump & it is painful. We are fortunate to have a great doctor who listens to her (me). We will have results in a few days. About 15yrs ago She had breast cancer & had her right breast removed. Thankfully she didn't need any chemo or additional treatment. She is struggling with the thought of more cancer as any normal person would. In the last 10 yrs we as a family lost my sister, her daughter to liver cancer. I believe she was 45yrs old.  Also my dad, her husband to pancreatic cancer 9 months later.
We will patiently wait for the results & then do what ever the doctors want to do...
Today is the anniversary of dad's death, She misses him greatly & says she's glad he isn't in pain anymore. Then she gets quiet, I wonder what else is going on, what else she is thinking, Is she afraid of the pain or of dying? She says she is ready to go whenever God is ready. I think she questions why He is waiting or what is He waiting for... But she know she's ready whenever He is ready.

Things that make me laugh & cringe at times

Doris: thank you for the new lotion
Me: wait that's my new lotion, I couldn't find it
Doris: oh good because I don't like the smell of that lotion

Doris: I really like your new jeans, they are darker and your butt doesn't look so big
Me: Thank you
Doris: They sell these things that hold your stomach in, that would help too...
Me: Yes spanx. I have some, thank you for your help...

Doris: let me see your nails, oh I like that color, that other one was awful...
Me: Well I liked the other one or I wouldn't had them use that color
Doris: I think it looked nasty....

Can you say broken filter.. The ole girl doesn't have one anymore.. Gotta laugh

Me: I need the name of your heart doctor
Doris: I can't find my address book with all the info wrote in it, but I think he is Mexican, his name is Juan & his office is across from the grocery store
Me: I'm going to need a little more info than that..... The next day
Doris: excitedly I remember my heart doctors name
Me: good what is it
Doris: I wrote it down so I'd remember it..... Dr Sanjay Gupta.... Looking please with herself..
Me: Dr. Gupta is a doctor on TV, he does a morning news show sometimes.... I don't think you can afford him
Doris: well I guess I will keep thinking....
Doris: I don't know why I'm so sleepy, all I do is sleep... I think I will go lay down
Me: ok ~ a few hours later doris you need to get up! you're sleeping too much & you'll be awake all night....
Doris: ok, gets up , sits doing word search puzzles or reads for a couple hours ~ I'm so tired I think I will lay down....
Me : In my head, whatever
Next morning:
Me: how did you sleep?
Doris: I was awake all night! I just laid there..
Me: you think it could be you slept too much during the day?
 Doris: I don't know, I'm going to lay down for awhile I'm really tired...
What a twisted cycle that needs to be broken, reminds me of a baby with its nights & days mixed up.... However the other part of me thinks how much alone time I can have if she's sleeping... Better go wake her up .

This morning: Time to wake up:
Doris: I feel so refreshed, I left the little heater off, I think that is was too warm in my room..
Me: could be, glad you feel better..
Doris: goes to bathroom, comes out & says I'm going to lay down I am just so tired...
Me: screaming in my head..... you've been up for 15min....

Things we have accomplished since Doris moved in:
Sleep test = new bipap machine
Hearing test = new to her hearing aids
Panic button = doesn't push it tho doesn't want to bother anyone....
Eye appt = checking glaucoma & cataract
Got doctor records & new doctor realized she wasn't getting thyroid meds.... Oops could be cause of excessive sleep
Loose screws removed = screws in her knees removed = less knee pain
Testing blood levels at home vs trip to doctor office (thanks to Shannon)
Appt for urologist, heart doctor, eye doctor
Paying bills from a year ago when she broke her leg.
Set up commission on aging for help with showering, cleaning her room and most important clipping those toenails....

Next on the list to accomplish Setting up visiting the senior center & make friends
Invite ladies in for coffee social with her...
Keep laughing....that is what is next on my list....

Oh Doris ~ a visit to the doctors office

On Dec 30th Doris was scheduled to have the screws in her knee removed.. These screws are a result of her falling a year ago and breaking her femur. She had been complaining her knee hurt, the screw hurt, etc...
The screws were removed without any problem, with one of them having broke. No wonder the screw was poking out and hurting.
Fast forward 10 days ~ the day to have the staples removed....
I told her we needed to leave 1/2 hr earlier than we actually needed to be there. History has shown me we will be late if she knows the actually time..
I drop her at the door & park, She finds a seat while I get her checked in...
I hear her (across a full waiting room) talking to someone about horses... She used to have an appaloosa stallion. (I disliked him after he threw me) then on to Mary Maxim a craft catalog.... I'm still wondering how those 2 relate to each other..
As I sit down next to her in a very loud voice she declares every woman her age needs a husband like mine.... I replied I believe he is too young for you & I'd like to keep him....
Everyone started laughing.. I'm encouraging her to talk lower & she's just not getting it. She decided every mother needs a daughter with a husband like mine... That works for me
She sees a special needs girl with her dad, very loudly she said look at that mongoloid girl, thankfully neither the girl or her dad heard her. I once again try to quiet her down to no avail...
A lady sitting way to close to us was wearing bright pink high heel shoes... Doris very loudly says You think I should get a pair of pink shoes like hers? I whip around & said don't be catty, you walk with a purple walker how are you going to manage high heels... Once again everyone is laughing.  I'm ready to die & can't look at the poor lady with pink shoes for fear of a nasty look.
We finally see the doctor, get the staples removed & we are off
She needed to sit by the door & catch her breath. I pulled the car up thinking she would be watching for me, silly me, She is looking all around the lobby, checking people out, totally forgetting I am waiting... I go back in & she looks surprised, you're here.... Yep I am. As we head home & I replay the last couple hours in my head I think this is why I blog....